Getting My Nerves Out
Friday, October 8th, 2010
Tomorrow at 6:30 a.m., I’ll take off with nearly 300 other runners at the start of the Dick Collins Firetrails 50. Right now, I should be getting ready to run 50 miles tomorrow — which is exactly 20 percent farther than I have ever run before. I have errands to run, gear to gather, bills to pay, a story to edit, a chapter to finish, email to answer, laundry to fold, an iPod to update, two kids to pick up, one dog to walk, logistics to coordinate. But I have accomplished virtually none of that yet today because I AM FREAKING OUT. Not the head-spinning, hollering kind of behavior that those all-cap words might suggest, but the caving-inward, desperately quiet kind that freezes me to this chair and erases from my mind all — wait, where was I going with this? See, that’s what I mean: I can’t finish a thought, much less a task. (more…)